Four Ways to Communicate Better

by Dora Raymaker · 2009-06-12 16:00:00 UTC
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the interior of a cave and a wooden sign that has the words 'Wishing Well' written on it in cursiveI'm writing a presentation today on self-advocacy for people who use non-standard communication, and seem unable to hold a thought about anything else in my head. So I'm posting related to that rather than anything more "newsy." Here are the top four things I wish people understood better about communicating with me.

1. Don't make assumptions. Difficulty with speaking and difficulty with thinking are not the same thing. Don't assume that because a person isn't using speech, or because a person's speech sounds very different from most people's, that the person can't understand what is going on, is not capable of their own self-determination, or doesn't have something important to say.

2. Communicate with the person, not with the communication aid. This includes both mechanical devices like speech synthesizers or communication boards as aids, and human translators, be they sign language interpreters, just a friend, or anything else. Never talk about someone in third person ("Can she talk?"); address the person directly ("Can you talk?").

3. Slow down. Many alternative communication methods are slower than real time speech. It's extremely difficult for a person who is used to real time speech to learn how to take turns appropriately with an AAC user, and it can take a lot of time and practice to get good at it--be mindful, and be patient. Real-time speech may also be a little less "real-time" to articulate than folks are used to and also necessitate a slow down. In other words, this item may be more difficult than it sounds. But it's critically important.

4. Be open and communicative. Communication via something besides real-time speech, or even "unusual" speech, can be intimidating for people who are not used to it. Devices can be off-putting, it may be difficult to understand how to react or respond, or to know what the protocols of conversation might be. I've found for my part a few instructions up front on things like, "I can hear you just fine," and, "Please don't talk until I tell you I'm done," or even a joke to help put the person at ease, "I'm not really a robot, honest!" can help a lot with this. However, the communication partner also bears equal responsibility to be communicative about their own needs, "Should I just talk normally?" or "Can you turn up the volume a little?" etc.

Dora Raymaker
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