Friday Unwind: 5 Ridiculous Lawyer Ads

by Matt Kelley · 2010-04-02 12:58:00 UTC
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Even the most serious and straightforward TV ads for law firms are usually pretty entertaining. They're right down there with used car ads, except for instead of offering "mindblowing deals," lawyers give themselves nicknames like "The Hammer" and promise to blow stuff up to bring you justice. (DUI and personal injury lawyers lead the pack on inspired advertising.)

And then there's the colorful print ads on the New York subway, which I also love. There's Fitzgerald and Fitzgerald, which claims huge settlements (each with its own asterisk that it was adjusted on appeal from $100 billion to five bucks and a free Happy Meal). What's more, they have a leprechaun boxer as a mascot.

But my favorite is a firm called Wilens & Baker, which hired a former news anchor named John Roland (left) to serve as their Sam Waterston-style spokesperson. But they identify him so prominently as a "compensated spokesperson" that it must counteract any benefit they get from his earnest, trustworthy appearance. Are Wilens & Baker so ugly that they couldn't appear this ad?

Blogger Adam Sacks found Roland so believable that he mocked up a few other ads (dogfood, maxi pads, a bridge for sale) that Roland might be able to pull off. It turns out compensated spokespersoning is a pretty good gig, and Roland is a versatile master.

So for this week's Friday Unwind, let's give thanks to our friends at ambulance-chasing law firms across the world for keeping us entertained with their desperate pleas to get your business:

5. The California Switchblade: I don't know how you earn a nickname like "The California Switchblade" -- there's gotta be a story there.

4. Rapanimation: Have you ever been injured in an accident? Call Flint. (via commenter W. Rogers Turner Jr. on Overlawyered)

3.Bulletproof: This one is a business card, not really an ad, but same ballpark and too good to pass up. Adam "Bulletproof" Reposa is apparently both a "Stud Trial Lawyer" and a "Total Stud Trial Lawyer." He has another card counting up his wins. Oh, and there's something about making furniture out of someone's skin, too. (Via ATL)

2. Don't Be A Victim Twice: Another bad rap?

1. You Call, I Hammer: Jim "The Hammer" Shapiro was feeling honest when shooting this, so in his explosion-laden ad he makes perfectly clear that he can not actually rip out the hearts of those that hurt you. He can, however, hunt them down and settle the score. Also, I wonder if Shapiro is related to Lowell "The Hammer" Stanley, whose catch phrase ain't so bad either: "I am the hammer and they are the nails". (The first hammer came via Esquire.)

Photo Credit: cantwork

Matt Kelley is the Online Communications Manager at the Innocence Project and a graduate of the Medill School of Journalism at Northwestern University. Follow him on Twitter @mattjkelley.
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