Giving Thanks for LGBT Victories and Allies

by Maia Spotts · 2009-11-26 03:00:00 UTC
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The gay community has, no doubt, felt a little emotionally pummeled these days. I know I have. Marriage equality defeats, gay teens being brutalized and killed, the rising moral majority's anti-gay voice, Carrie Prejean -- it sometimes feels as though we aren't gaining any traction. It can be heartbreaking and soul crushing, and I am so totally over feeling disappointed and disregarded. These things take time, lots of time, so I try to persevere. When the good news rolls in, and it did this month, I am reminded to be thankful for the headway being made, and to use the positive momentum to push through the crappy stuff.

So I am thankful for California, where I got married, and adopted my kids, and where judges are speaking out against the Defense of Marriage Act by compensating federal employees who are denied insurance coverage for their same-sex spouses.

And I am thankful for New York, where my marriage will continue to be recognized, and where I can live protected in my home and my community and be covered under my wife's insurance. I will try very hard to believe Governor Patterson each time he promises a vote on New York's own gay marriage bill.

I give thanks for a Vermont judge who focused on a child's best interest and awarded custody to her non-biological lesbian mother. It's nice to be reminded that biology doesn't always make you the best parent. Turns out, actually, being a lesbian makes you the best parent. That one really made my day.

Thank you to Argentina, Melody Barnes, and 42% of America for saying, simply, gay marriage is OK by me.

And thank you 10-year-old Will Phillips for refusing to say the pledge of allegiance because "liberty and justice for all" is a promise, and for recognizing that right now, in our country, it's a big fat lie. You give us all hope for the future.

As LGBT activists around the world gear up for another round in this brutal battle it is paramount that we face the hate and embrace the progress, baby steps and all. For every Maine there is a Kalamazoo and a Washington state. Ted Haggard is back, and he hates the gays a little less. There are LGBT allies in the Government - let's thank them for always keeping us in mind. The point is, it's not all one step forward, two steps back. Despite efforts against us, gay men and women are happily living their lives -- with families and careers and people who support them. For that, I am thankful.

(Photo courtesy of -Marlith-'s Photostream on Flickr)

Maia Spotts is one part of a two mom, two kid household and hopes to change the way in which this country defines the strong American family.
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