Glee's Missing Gay Dads, and Other Burning Questions

by Cristian Asher · 2010-06-14 17:41:00 UTC
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All right, Glee is over for the season. Aside from reliving the whole thing as it’s rerun on Thursdays this summer, we have nothing to console us but our memories and a bazillion iTunes downloads. Glee did not end on a cliffhanger, so there are no mysteries to agonize over — no Hatch, no Who Shot somebody or other, no Oh My God Did Starbuck Really Die? (Sorry, I’m revealing both my age and my geekiness here.) But on the other hand, there are a few other questions, like …

WHO ARE THE BIG GUEST STARS GOING TO BE NEXT YEAR?

This year, Glee mined Broadway for its greatest talent. Jonathan Groff, Idina Menzel, and Kristin Chenoweth all turned up and tuned up repeatedly, sang their hearts out, and lent the show a major dollop of musical theatre fabulousness. There was another recurring theme of pop stars, including the delicious Olivia Newton-John and the unexpectedly hilarious Josh Groban (not since “I’m F*#@ing Ben Affleck” has Groban so beautifully turned the tables on his own super-glossy stardom.)

So, next year, what about musical stars of earlier eras? Shirley MacLaine as a nutsy art teacher? Debbie Reynolds as Will’s grandmother? Julie Andrews as, well, anything at all? Or, what about some big name recording stars? Sheryl Crow is surely ripe for an acting career, and Bon Jovi used to have one. Or what about actors who have already successfully dabbled in musicals and claimed to love them, like Ewan McGregor, John Travolta, Nicole Kidman, Harry Connick Jr., or Meryl Streep (all right, she didn’t sing very well, but she can pull off anything). The singing, dancing Hollywood world is Glee’s oyster right now — who’s going to become the next big name Gleek?

WHAT SPECIALTY SHOWS WILL THEY DO?

All right, the Madonna episode was a mixed bag, at best. But the Lady Gaga / Kiss one was terrific. There have been rumors of talks with the Boss, himself, Bruce Springsteen. And surely by this time those kids have sung more than enough Barbra Streisand tunes to fill a full show. Next season, how about something new — Nashville? Reba McEntire alone has recorded enough angst to fill half the season. Or what about a whole show of original music, hm? Maybe Puck is a secret song writer …

WHERE ARE THOSE GAY DADS???

Okay, Glee producers, enough is enough. Either Rachel has two gay dads, or else she was raised by singing wolves and that photo snapshot in the first episode came with the frame when she bought it. Really. We’ve seen every other parent among the lead kids, now, and even Sue gets to have a sister. Throw us a bone, guys — you’ve created the greatest paean to musical theatre fetishism the TV world has ever seen, and you’ve denied us the two gay characters who could really make the most of it!

A diva like Rachel surely deserves a couple of unforgettable dads. Even Entertainment Weekly agrees with me on this (although what are they thinking with some of those suggestions? Marilyn Manson???) So where are they? Who’s going to play them? And when will they finally be ready for their close-up?

Send a message to Glee's producers letting them know that it's time for two magical and loving gay dads to make their big Glee-ful debut.

Photo credit: Noodles and Beef

Cristian Asher is a writer and graphic designer from California, where he and his husband are one of California's 18,000 legally married same-sex couples.
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