Marriage Rate Drops During Recession

A lot of unhappily married couples have found that during the recession, sticking it out makes economic sense. But while divorce is expensive, hey, so are weddings. For the first time in more than a century, it looks like both are taking a hit, largely based on the terrible economy.

By analyzing the new Census Bureau data, the Population Reference Bureau has discovered that marriage rates are at their lowest recorded levels. The New York Times reports that some heterosexual couples are putting off marriage because their collective economic future seems too unstable to commit to anything else at the moment.

That seems fair enough, though I have to wonder: do you really need financial stability to fall and stay in love? It certainly helps, but isn't that a myopic view of relationships, legal or otherwise?

The study puts some of the marriage decline blame on gender equality, noting "that women's higher earning capacity, and the declining economic prospects of young men without a college degree, are key factors contributing to the decline in marriage in recent years." This may all be true, but as always, I'm troubled by language that women's economic equality should somehow be blamed for anything, particularly the decline of something — traditional marriage — that has also held women back.

I understand that the economy is forcing us to confront a lot of gender and poverty related issues right now, and that's tough for a lot of people. Admittedly, growth can be painful. At the same time, I hope this opens more people up to alternative ideas about how we celebrate couples and love. I don't necessarily begrudge anyone who wants to have a frilly, festive party to celebrate their life together, but I am pretty rankled by the idea that recognizing commitment is only possible when paired with a formal, expensive, legal ceremony. Is it just me, or is a little odd when people wish a newly married couple well in their life together? Last I checked, they'd already been building a life, just like all sorts of queer and non-married heterosexual couples do every day. A life together doesn't begin the day you exchange rings and sign some paperwork.

If anything, I think some of this signals a way to start reconceptualizing love, marriage, and money. Hopefully, this will cause some people to reconsider the enormous (and frankly embarrassing) amounts of money they spend to show off their legalized love with lavish ceremonies, expensive cards, and gift registries. It may even make a few down-on-their-luck, reluctantly cohabitating heterosexual couples realize that they're the only ones who can get married, whenever they want to opt in, and think twice about how that reflects on the legitimacy of queer couples' limited legal options.

Photo Credit: Wedding Photography by Jon Day