Mike Huckabee: Gays Should Only Be Allowed to Adopt Puppies

For somebody who tries to bill his political identity around the idea of being jovial, easy-going and funny, Mike Huckabee sure is mean. Darn mean. A Lee Atwater with a crucifix, Huckabee is stepping up his vitriol in the wake of what could be his second run for President in 2012. And judging from the tenor of some of his recent comments, Huckabee is going to run on a platform of demonizing the humanity of gays and lesbians.

Huckabee gave an interview with The Perspective, a newsmagazine for the College of New Jersey, where he went off on the subject of gay rights. He called gay people disingenuous. He said that same-sex marriage was akin to drug addiction. And he said that the only thing gays and lesbians should be allowed to adopt are puppies.

And then he blew the smoke off his gun, twirled it around and slid it back into his holster. Talk about firing a few pot shots.

For all the talk of Sarah Palin, Mitt Romney, Tim Pawlenty, Newt Gingrich, or John Thune running for President in 2012, perhaps the scariest thought is a President Huckabee, at least in regards to civil rights. Yes, Huckabee has never been down with the equal rights movement. But beyond any other candidate potentially in the field, Huckabee not only admits to being anti-gay, he brags about it. Forget about a pit bull with lipstick. Here's one who wields a guitar and yuks it up with Chuck Norris.

Point by point, Huckabee tackled many of the planks in the struggle for equal rights. First up? The question of repealing "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

"I wouldn’t support a repeal if I were commander-in-chief. You don’t see foot soldiers out there demanding it. I’m not sure that’s the most important thing we ought to be doing for the military," Huckabee said. "I think we certainly should be very sensitive to the fact that the purpose of the military is not to see if we can create social experiments."

If you place that statement from Huckabee in, say, the mid-1940s, it could be used almost word for word to justify segregation in the U.S. Armed Forces. It's a different time period now, but it's the same bat channel (to put it in Batman terms). Too bad Huckabee has his facts wrong. Most "foot soldiers" are actually becoming pretty cool with the idea of repealing "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," as well as many of the military's leaders, including Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Admiral Mike Mullen and Defense Secretary Robert Gates.

Next up for Huckabee was same-sex marriage. This is where he calls LGBT people liars for originally championing civil unions, but then switching over to full marriage equality.

"I think there’s been a real level of being disingenuous on the part of the gay and lesbian community with their goal of civil unions," Huckabee said, chiding gay rights activists in places like Vermont and New Hampshire for pushing civil unions as a ruse for marriage equality. "You don’t go ahead and accommodate every behavioral pattern that is against the ideal. That would be like saying, well, there are a lot of people who like to use drugs, so let’s go ahead and accommodate those who want who use drugs."

No offense to Mrs. Huckabee, but with an attitude like that when it comes to relationships, I'm really glad I'm not married to Mike Huckabee. For Huckabee, love is nothing more than a behavioral pattern. And to compare any relationship, let alone the 20- or 30- or 40-year relationships that many gay men and women have to drug addiction? Well, that just shows how low Huckabee is willing to go. And then there's Huckabee's phrase "against the ideal." Isn't "the ideal" fostering a culture where two people can love each other free of harassment?

But the worst of Huckabee's comments came in reference to LGBT adoption. The state where Huckabee was governor, Arkansas, is one of the few states in the country with an outright ban on gay adoption. For Huckabee, you'd think that the Arkansas ban on gay adoption was like winning the lottery.

"I think this is not about trying to create statements for people who want to change the basic fundamental definitions of family. Children are not puppies," Huckabee concluded.

Children aren't puppies? Really? Well, I tell ya', if you open up a can of Mighty Dog and put it near a baby, that baby is going to go for it....

No, in all seriousness, it says a lot about Mike Huckabee that he believes gays and lesbians change the definition of family, and are incapable of raising healthy children. Sure, that flies in the face of science and every major sociological or child welfare study. But who needs science and sociology when, like Huckabee, you have some right-wing religious principles to fall back on?

Huckabee ended his interview with The Perspective by saying that he would prefer all American presidents to be Christian, but that he could handle an atheist president if he had to. And his closing words are somewhat fitting.

"It’s better to have a person who says, ‘Look, I just don’t believe, and that’s where my honest position happens to be.’ I’m frankly more OK with that than a person who says, ‘Oh, I am very much a Christian. I very much love God.’ And then they live as if they are atheists, as if they have no moral groundings at all. That’s more troubling," he said.

Now there's some irony. Because after reading his interview with The Perspective, I know I'm certainly left with the thought that Mike Huckabee thinks he's very much a Christian, but hardly acting with any sort of love or compassion for some of his fellow citizens, particularly LGBT people.

Meanwhile, I say we all get to work electing a gay atheist President. That should give Huckabee something to chew on.

Photo credit: marcn