Need a Good Spanking? Try Christian Domestic Discipline Marriage

by Roxann MtJoy · 2010-03-18 06:00:00 UTC

Just when I think I have seen it all, I stumble upon something called Christian Domestic Discipline (CDD) marriage, a rising trend in conservative Christian households.  A CDD marriage, for the uninitiated, is "marriage is one in which one partner is given authority over the other, and has the means to back up that authority, usually by spanking." And, of course, that one partner with authority is always the man and always in reference to a heterosexual relationship. I guess the LGBT community has to miss out on all the domestic violence fun.

You see, according to this popular CDD website, modern culture with its "radically selfish feminism" and its "wholesale bias against true manhood" is undermining good old fashioned Christian heterosexual marriage. Clearly, this can all be fixed with spanking.

Husbands, don't worry if you don't already know how to best smack your wife around. CDD websites are full of helpful tips! For example,  you should "take caution not to deliver the lashes anywhere but the buttocks," remind your wife that "she is not in control of this discipline," and while you "may find it difficult to cause your wife pain," you need to remember that "as a woman she needs the release of guilt that this form of punishment brings." If your wife sinned in front of your children, she should be spanked in front of them, too. Oh, and don't feel confused if this seems like mixing business with pleasure: "a woman’s bottom," one site claims, "was created not only as an enticement to men but as a target for his hand when she disobeys."

With descriptions such as those, who could resist the pull of a Christian Domestic Discipline marriage? It has it all: domestic violence, homophobia, and the humiliation of women. I had thought my marriage, based on equality, mutual respect, and openness was solid. I see now that I have let my selfish feminism cloud my view.

In all seriousness, though, this trend is incredibly disturbing. No matter how you dress up domestic violence, no matter what higher calling you attribute it to, hitting your partner is wrong. Hitting them once is unacceptable; establishing a system of violence that governs your marriage is twisted and horrifying and must be stopped.

Photo credit: frankie m.

Roxann MtJoy is a freelance writer who previously worked as a case manager at a domestic violence shelter. She is currently attending graduate school for theater in Mount Vernon, N.Y.
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