New York Observer Claims Women Value Family, Not Feminism

This past Sunday marked the 50th anniversary of the Federal Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approving the Pill. Most articles on the subject have focused on how the Pill changed women's lives; this piece in the New York Observer, however, takes a decidedly different approach: it pits feminism against families and decides that the former is outdated, while the latter is all the rage. Because we all know that a woman can't be both a feminist and family-oriented, right?

The article, which includes a link to a slideshow entitled "9 Women Who Prefer Prams to Politics," characterizes feminists as baby-hating whores, while modern young moms who care more about stroller rights than reproductive rights are the truely enlightened ones. It actually uses an analogy comparing feminism to canned peas and motherhood to fresh sugarsnap peas. Ugh.

The obvious truth that seems to be missing here is that feminism and the Pill are all about choice. Have kids if you want, don't if you'd rather not. Feminism and family are not mutually exclusive principles. In fact, they support one another. Not, however, according to one woman quoted in the Observer, who said, "Women are defining themselves more by their families than they are by themselves. It’s no longer about something as selfish and self-advancing as abortion or the pill.” Apparently this woman thinks that choosing when and how to have children is selfish, but losing your identity in that of your family is a giant leap forward for women. Of course.

To support this argument, the article points to celebrity moms like Gwyneth Paltrow, Sandra Bullock, and Sarah Jessica Parker, whose latest Sex and the City movie apparently "seems like a sad relic of the late-’90s credos of do-me and lipstick feminism." After all, if celebrities like having babies, that must be the thing to do!

I don't know about you, but I am sick and tired of feminism being painted as anti-family. Just because a woman believes in the oh-so-radical ideology that she is equal to a man does not mean that she doesn't want to be a mother. The Pill gave us a choice in family planning that women never had before. Demonizing that choice doesn't do anybody any favors, including mothers. Families and feminists are friends, not foes.

Photo credit: Liz Henry