Show Me The Money: Why Don't More Women Ask For A Raise?

The New York Times had an excellent op-ed this weekend by Joanne Lipman, the former deputy managing editor at The Wall Street Journal who was also the founding editor in chief of Condé Nast Portfolio magazine.

The piece titled, "The Mismeasure of Woman" reflects on the Shriver Report and catalogs many of the issues women face today in society: the false-positive sense of equality among young women, the effect of 9/11 on women, the stalled progress of women to achieve equal pay and crash through the glass ceiling to run Fortune 500 companies, law firms and businesses.

The part of the article that may have resonated the loudest for some was how women can end up being their own worst enemy in the job market:

In my time as an editor, many, many men have come through my door asking for a raise or demanding a promotion. Guess how many women have ever asked me for a promotion?

I'll tell you. Exactly ... zero.

Sure, it's a risk to ask for a raise. But women need to take risks - and to realize that at some point they will fail. This is an incredibly hard thing to do, especially for women brought up in a culture that celebrates unrealistic perfection in every sphere, from beauty to housekeeping.

Everyday I hear from a female friend who wants to earn more money at their job, but instead of negotiating a raise, they wait for their boss to do it for them. The problem with this method is that unless they receive a promotion it is unlikely their boss will step in and offer up company profits to their employees.

Additionally, many of my female friends don't always think about negotiating the salary they want when they start a new job, which is the most crucial time to leverage a better salary. No one should ever start a new job without a desirable base pay. It is very hard to jump a salary up by 10, 20 or 30 percent after you start working. While I believe there are systematic reasons behind why white women earn 77 cents, African American women earn only 69 cents and Latinas just 59 cents to to men's dollar - it is also our responsibility to take risks, negotiate a better pay and smash the glass ceiling once and for all.

For those in a position to negotiate salary or switch jobs here are a few tips I've learned along the way about getting the pay you want and deserve:

1. Look ahead. When switching jobs ask for a salary that is 5 - 10% above the money you would receive if you were promoted tomorrow at your current job. This will ensure that you aren't losing out on money you could have earned by staying in the same place.
2. Stay calm and collected. Even if you are desperate for any job, don't let the prospective employer realize that. By giving specific salary demands, it shows that you know the market landscape and what is a competitive rate for the position.
3. Know your self worth and market worth. Measure everything you do from how many clients you work with, how much money you've been in charge of, and the unique relationships or networks you have that no one else can claim. These things should give you an advantage in the workplace and help you speak intelligently if your boss asks you why you deserve a raise.
4. Don't budge. If a new employer doesn't offer you the number you want, then try to decline the job if you can afford it. It is probably not worth it in the long run if an employer isn't willing to start you at the salary you want and need.
5. Negotiate additional benefits. If you can't get the exact salary you are looking for, try to negotiate additional benefits such as vacation, sick days or the ability to consult outside the business.

Finally, Lipman's op-ed does a great job summarizing the state of reminding all of us about the most important thing with any job, relationship or endeavor: "make sure respect is part of the equation too."

Respect, above anything else, is the best currency one can negotiate with. Give respect, get respect. It can be that easy.

What are your tips for getting the pay you want and deserve?

Photo Credit: Emdot