Straight People Who Only Want to Marry in Gay Marriage States

What's one way for straight allies to support the push for marriage equality? According to Matt Borden and Rachel Henes, it's to make sure that your straight wedding takes place in a state that supports the right of same-sex couples to marry.

That's why Borden and Henes, resident New Yorkers, will be making a June trek to Connecticut. New York does not recognize gay marriage. Connecticut does. And that's why Borden and Henes want to show the Nutmeg State some love.

"When we were thinking about getting married it was hard not to look around and realize that it was a real privilege that we could," said Borden, according to The Villager. So the couple decided to use their wedding day as a means for activism. They'll head on up to Connecticut, and they'll also ask friends and family members to send a letter to legislators in New York, letting them know that because the state doesn't recognize gay marriage, the Borden-Henes wedding was held in a state that did.

“We know so many other couples who care about the issue but don’t necessarily connect it to their wedding day,” Henes added.

Now their goal is to start a bit of a campaign to get straight couples to head to one of six places that recognize gay marriage within the U.S.: Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, Vermont, New Hampshire, or Washington, D.C. (Here's hoping those folks on the west coast and in the deep south have some frequent flier miles to cash in.) Will straight folks buy in?

The campaign is a bit of a twist on another popular campaign that launched in the aftermath of Proposition 8: the National Marriage Boycott. That campaign, started at Stanford but viral enough to pop up at other colleges (and even high schools) around the country, seeks to get people to pledge to avoid marriage until everyone had access to equal marriage rights, whether that's next year or in 55 years.

The boycott is still going strong, with students dawning rings and saying "no" to marriage. Students like Leah Thomas (class of '13) who said, "I boycott marriage because I don't believe civil rights are up for debate."

Or Susan Rebellon (class of '10) who said, "The queer community is made up of some of the most caring and loyal individuals I have ever met. It makes absolutely no sense to refuse to recognize a committed queer relationship simply because of gender."

They're just two of many who are taking part in the National Marriage Boycott's "Why I boycott" initiative, where students give some personal testimony about why they're moved to protest the idea of marriage until all couples (straight and LGBT) can get married. Check out some other statements from boycott supporters here.

And be on the lookout in the coming days for a Facebook page from Matt Borden and Rachel Henes, trying to coalesce people around their idea of getting married in gay marriage states. As Borden concluded to The Villager, "If every straight person decided they were not going to get married in a state where same-sex marriage was illegal, I think there would be a huge shift. We really hope that it catches on."

Ditto, Mr. Borden. Ditto.

Photo credit: linh.ngân