Top 10 Ways to Make a Difference

by Kristina Chew and Dora Raymaker

Joining a walk for autism; wearing an "autism awareness" wristband: How else can you make a real, concrete difference for an autistic individual, and for her or his family? Here's ten to try:

1. Get Informed
There's a lot of information about autism and autistic people on the Internet, in the media, and in the public consciousness. Not all of this information is valid, accurate, or helpful to autistic people and their families. Approach autism information cautiously; use critical thinking. Question "experts": remember that somewhere exists the world's most incompetent scientist! Learn from people on the spectrum what their experiences are like. Learn from people with other types of disabilities what their experiences are like. Keep a cool head and think about why people might hold the opinions they do. Help to dispel myths, stereotypes, and misinformation when you encounter them.

2. Watch Your Language
It makes a difference how you talk about autism. Do you talk about autism as "disability" and "difference" rather than "disorder" and "disease," as something "devastating" and a "tragedy," as a "disaster"----as a "death sentence? Listen to how you hear other people speak about autism, and to what you yourself are saying. How often do you hear autism referred to as something negative, as something that has to be prevented and eliminated? Ask yourself: How would you feel if that's all that people said about you? What if, instead, we talked about autism in terms of diversity and of being different, in ways that call on us to think differently about what it means to be human?

3. Empower Leaders
Often people with disabilities, including autism, are either directly or indirectly disempowered. You can help to empower today's leaders by supporting self advocacy organizations run in full or part by individuals with disabilities, including autism and other developmental disabilities. You can help to empower future leaders by supporting programs that teach leadership and advocacy skills to people with disabilities, including autism. You can help empower individuals directly by treating them with the same respect you would treat a person who does not have a disability. Know that a person doesn't have to be creating vast change in the world to be an empowered leader--simply sticking up for one's rights, communicating one's needs (in whatever mode of communication is effective!), and having control over one's own life is enough.

4. Please Don't Stare
Please don't rush to judge a child who seems to be "misbehaving" and their parent, or someone who is doing "weird/odd/bizarre things"; please don't just assume that the child's parents are "lax," ineffective people who have no idea how to control their child. An autistic person who's having the sort of "tantrum" that people expect to see only in a toddler might be having a moment of deep anxiety and sensory overload. At such a moment, an autistic individual and her or his parents may not want help and advice (which can feel intrusive and judgmental): What they really need---what we really need---is understanding and compassion.

5. Support Disability Policy
Most of the policies that are good for people with disabilities in general are also good for people on the autistic spectrum. Support and work to uphold anti-discrimination policies such as the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) and Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973. Help to pass bills that include funding for services, better health care, access to beneficial therapy, and procurement of assistive technology such as communication devices. Lobby for Medicaid waivers, so that people with developmental disabilities can both hold fulfilling employment and still get the day-to-day assistance they need to survive. Support independent living centers, scholarships for people with disabilities, and programs for community inclusion.

6. Consider Yourself
Maybe you're different too? How has being different----in terms of religion, race, ethnicity, class---affected you and your life choices? Transfer this understanding to what it's like to be autistic, to be different, to be (as animal scientist Temple Grandin has said) an "anthropologist on Mars": For Kristina and her husband, Jim, learning about and accepting the things that make Charlie "different" have been essential, and have led them to reflect on their own differences, neurological and other.

7. Take Action
Blog, twitter, email, post, and tell others what you've learned about autism, autistic people, and autistic and disability rights. If you see a person with a disability or their friends or family members being discriminated against, abused, or treated otherwise inhumanely or unfairly, help to champion them. Get involved with an autistic, developmental / intellectual disability, or general disability organization (one that has actual disabled people on its board!) and take part in the group's initiatives--or support the organization with a donation. If you are an educator, teach tolerance in the classroom while also providing academic accommodations. If you are an employer, hire a qualified person on the autistic spectrum and give them the workplace accommodations they need to succeed. If you are anyone at all, give individuals on the spectrum a chance and the tools to succeed.

8. Autism is Global, But Think and Act Local
Joining a "walk for autism" is one thing you can do, but how can you help to make an actual concrete change in the life of an autistic individual, or of their family?

You can: Find out if there autistic children in your child's classroom, or in a Scout troop, or a gymnastics class, or if a friend has an autistic sibling or relative, or if one of your co-workers is autistic. Talk to you child about autism so that, when they see a 5' 4" tall boy who doesn't seem to be able to talk and walks around with his hands over his ears, you can say something more than "just ignore him". Parents of autistic individuals may often yearn to feel included to, and not just to receive a kindly smile when they mention their child's latest achievements (finally learning the alphabet after several years). The "help" that Kristina has often most appreciated is when people have reached out, in direct and simple ways, such as letting her and Charlie go ahead in a long line at a crowded grocery store.

9. Promote Tolerance More tolerance of difference--any sort of difference--in the world ultimately helps all people who are different. Seek to understand the experiences of all people who are marginalized, and apply that understanding toward a greater empathy.

10. What's Going On Around You?
Find out what kinds of services and supports and programs there are for autistic children and for autistic adults in your school district, in your community. What kinds of special education programs are offered at your child's school? at your YMCA or community center or place of worship? Does your company employ any disabled workers? How often do you see disabled workers in your community, whether working at grocery stores or stocking shelves, or in other positions? Is there a group home in your neighborhood that you've somehow never noticed?

Autism, and autistic individuals, are only "invisible" if you don't try to see them.