Wal-Mart Briefly Imposes Sanctions, Pretends to Have a Soul

by Angela Longerbeam · 2010-01-23 07:00:00 UTC
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Rather than moving Leno back to his old time slot and bidding Conan adieu, NBC should have considered an alternative solution for its late-night comedy fare: fire both comedians and hire the spokespeople at Wal-Mart.

Earlier this month, Wal-Mart briefly severed ties with Cosan SA Industria & Comercia, one of the world’s largest sugar producers, which was blacklisted in late December by the Brazilian Labor Ministry for alleged slave-labor practices. In a statement regarding the sanctions, Wal-Mart’s representatives delivered this comedic gem: Wal-Mart “vehemently repudiates any practice that does not respect human rights.”

Holy moly. Cue the laugh track!

Taking a brief look at Volde-Mart: A History, we know that the company couldn’t be bothered with labor regulations for various import factories in Afghanistan and Pakistan. And we know that Wal-Mart also sold Christmas decorations manufactured in Chinese sweatshops as recently as this past holiday season. In fact, there are enough stories showcasing Wal-Mart’s special brand of class that it requires its very own watchdog group.

Cosan was originally placed on the labor ministry’s blacklist because of practices used back in 2007 by a third-party cane cutter, with which it has severed ties. The sugar company has since been removed from the blacklist, and its business relationship with Wal-Mart has been reinstated. Should it return once again to the blacklist, Lord Volde-Mart claims it will “take the necessary measures” in response. Whatever that means. Perhaps it will cast a dark cloud of soul-sucking gloom over Brazil’s countryside?

While Wal-Mart’s initial sanctions against Cosan are, in fact, laudable, the motivation it claims is downright laughable. Who exactly is the company trying to kid? Wal-Mart’s motivation is money, plain and simple, and it seems that customer response to its labor policies and practices is finally translating into the numbers the company covets. Regardless of its shiny PR statements and strategic response to this recent slave-labor issue, we should never believe for a moment that Retail’s Dark Lord has grown to know love -- much less a conscience.

At any rate, I guess we take what we can get.

Photo credit: kaibara87

Angela Longerbeam is a freelance writer and pop culture addict fighting to end modern-day slavery with an MFA degree and irrepressible snark.
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