Why We Stopped Going to Toys 'R' Us

Toys 'R' Us has a list of 10 toys that speak to autism. The list is here and includes a train set, K'nex, a special set of Crayola markers with permanently attached paint brushes, stacking and nesting blocks, a camera with what I'm presuming is a very tough plastic outercase (in the event of being dropped/tossed/etc.). The camera in particular would have been interesting to have had when Charlie was younger; he had variations of all the rest, though not with some of the clever doodads (the Crayola paintbrushes "won't dry out," the "My First Story Reader Sesame Beginnings" books have buttons and carry handles).

Certainly it's helpful to have some suggestions about toys when stepping into the mega big-box atmosphere of a Toys 'R' Us store. In the interest of "autism awareness," I'm wondering what Toys 'R' Us could also do to make in its stores less, well, stressful. Because stressful is the best way to describe what it was like for Charlie to be in a Toys 'R' Us store, which is over-stimulating to the max, what with the overly tall aisles crammed with the latest from Hasbro, Fisher-Price, and Hot Wheels and (in some stores) ferris wheels and the like. We have always bid a hasty retreat for the Exit after buying some item we weren't sure Charlie, or any of us, thought anyone wanted---just wanted to get out of there. When he was 5, Charlie pretty much insisted on making a beeline for the video/DVD section and those proved the only things he was ever interested in.

We haven't been inside a Toys 'R' Us since Charlie was 7 or so. Target might have fewer selections, but still enough to choose from, and I started finding most things for Charlie online. Most of the Toys 'R' Us toy selections are fairly "busy" in appearance, with lots of colors and patterns and little drawings. Charlie's always been drawn to toys that are in solid colors and without too many extraneous parts: We like to keep it simple. One of his most favorite toys when he was younger was a barn set, with little plastic animals, a wagon, three plastic bales of hay, one farmer, two water troughs, four pieces of fence (I remember all this because I was constantly taking inventory and tracking down missing pieces to store in the two-story, four-roomed barn).

So I'd suggest that Toys 'R' Us, if it's serious about being "autism-friendly," rethink the big box design and offer ways to sensitive toy-shopping to the sensory-challenged. Something has to be done about the glare of the fluorescent lights and the sheer overwhelmingness of being surrounded by "so much." Sure, I know you can just choose (as we did) not to go into a Toys 'R' Us. But toy-purchasing being one of those things one finds oneself doing if one has a child (of whatever diagnosis), perhaps there's a way to make the whole experience less.......stressful. And, actually, fun.